Performance decline

Question
Our son is 16 years old and has been swimming for almost 9 years. He has really enjoyed the sport.  He has made steady improvements over the years. He has been a consistent "B" to "BB" swimmer and even some "A" times in the distance events. Last year he joined the high school swim team. His times were good and he made gains, however he was bullied severely and quit the team at the end of the season.  This year, he rejoined his former private team that he quit 2 years ago, in order to swim with his high school team. On the current private team, he is safe from bullies, however he is the oldest on the team, because the other kids his age are swimming for their respective high schools.  This year, he has not really improved any of his times, and in some cases, they are dramatically worse.  He is working out very hard with his new coach. He has started lifting weights 2-3X/week with a trainer.  Although the other kids on his current team are younger, the practices are often harder than the high school. The new coach however doesn't appear to be spending much time trying to work on his technique. She definitely seems to be favoring her "stars" and we feel she has given up on him.  At this point, we are not sure if this is a mental issue due to his thinking he should still be on his high school team and is not. Is it a technique issue, lack of taper and shave before big meets, not being allowed to wear a fast-skin where he has previously gotten his best times, worrying too much about what parents and coaches think? He also worries about being bullied/harassed when he sees his former tormenters/team-mates at meets. (although there is no reason to believe they have bothered him at all since he left the high school team) At this point we are almost ready to give up on swimming.  We would love to go to a different team, but it would require long drives and risk us being labelled "club-hoppers and impossible to please". Any suggestions you have would be appreciated. Any suggestions on how to approach his coach? She can be very hard to get a hold of and defensive.

Answer
Mike--There is a lot going on here and I would love to help, but I need a little more info.
Starting with the high school issue: Is he bigger or smaller than the other kids, is he faster or slower, was he just not liked?
It could also be a mental issue, too much internal pressure--trying to please everyone and not enjoying what he is doing, swimming is supposed to be fun!
Is his new coach young(in her 20's) or older?
How far is the drive to another team?  Where do you live? I'd really like to help you guys out if I can.  You can email me if it would be easier:[email protected].
George