QuestionMy daughter is a senior this year. She started the first two non-conference games and played extremely well at left hitter. Her coach mentioned a nearby college was interested in her next year. After those first couple games, she began to struggle, timing is off, bad hits, then self doubt. Coach has now moved her to middle hitter. She's upset that she'll no longer be scouted. I've printed off info. off the Internet. Most of the info. contains ideas her coaches and I have already told her. I've even thought about self-hypnosis/confidence recordings. How can we help her in time to save her season?
AnswerSaturday October 3rd:
Good evening again. How's it going? How is she playing? I've been thinking about you since you sent me this question a few weeks ago. If I can do anything for you, please contact me at
[email protected]
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Thursday Sept 24:
Good evening!
Are you considering sending me a video or DVD?
Hope to meet you this summer at a STAR camp!
Yes, a girl can attend a high school camp after she's graduated.
Tom
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Good evening, and welcome to www.allexperts.com!
I'm back! And I have several things to offer you.
FIRST, her season is not in need of saving. She's moved from OH to MB. About half way through our club season last winter/spring, I finally gave up on one of my 5'10" girls playing OH, and moved her back to MB where she was the most comfortable, even though she wasn't big enough to play that position. Oh, well. She still started, and LOVED IT!! And we won the Old Dominion Region bid to NATIONALS and spent a week in Miami. So, she wouldn't say her season needed saving or was wasted.
By the way, your daughter is still starting also. Her coach still believes that she's still one of the best players on the team! If her season was lost, then she'd have a torn ACL. Or have been in a car wreck.
SECOND, "No longer be scouted?" WHAT? Who put that in her head? You can tell I said, "That's a stupid thing to think." Sorry, but sometimes I just say the blunt truth. You can tell her this also: "A college coach isn't expecting a finished product. The coach is expecting someone with character, with good grades, and is trustworthy and athletic." Does your daughter possess those qualities? Then, the college coach (who may know more vball in his little finger than some h.s. coaches know in their entire body) will take her, regardless of whether she's hitting .300 or .000. The coach may even be able to fix whatever is wrong.
THIRD, why do you think it's mental. It may be mechanical. For example, I just watched a match tonight, and a 5'6" leaping senior OH at a local school HAD FIXED an arm swing issue that she'd had since I met her in the 8th grade. And she was hitting GREAT! I spoke to her after the match, and told her, "I haven't given you any feedback on your armswing since a private lesson we had a year ago! And you've kept it fixed on your own!! I've never seen anyone fix a messed up armswing just with willpower." She said w/o bragging, "I wanted to be better. I realized you were right and that I wasn't swinging like people who were better than me. So I did what you told me." Amazing.
Your response to what I just said may be, "I told you that she played GREAT in the first two matches. It's not mechanical." Sure, I read that. Just b/c your daughter had good stats doesn't mean she is technically sound. The senior above would have great stats as a soph vs. PoDunk High, but have horrible stats vs. a good team b/c of her armswing issues. And I would bet the mortgage that your daughter DOES have a mechanical issue if those first two matches were against teams that are now 0-10 and 2-8, but her recent struggles have been vs. teams that are average or above.
So that I can check it out, send me a video of her spiking, either attached to an email, or on a DVD. I would like to have it from the side, if possible. And I'd like to see her hit balls in a match setting, so she won't be trying to fix it while she knows she's "on the spot". After I look at it, I will tell you what I see. And just b/c she's been to ABC University camp, or had lessons with Coach XYZ, doesn't mean her armswing is right. I've never met a coach who can detect and fix a messed up armswing, other than me. (Also not bragging). A few years ago, my D1 stepd. had a teammate with a bad armswing. I told the assistant, "I can fix her," and was told, "We can do it." It was never done. And I would guess that the girl never was told.
If you email me at
[email protected], I'll give you a mailing address to send a DVD to.
FOURTH, I guess a sport psychologist can't hurt anything but your bank account. And it may be all that she needs. I've never known a high school kid who's ever gone to one. Doesn't mean none of my kids ever have. I just didn't know of it. But if she's got a flaw in her armswing, then all the affirmation statements in the state of Texas won't help her hit better.
Now I'm talking to you: Don't you dare say stuff like, "If you don't do better, then......," or "I can't believe you're not ......," or "What's wrong with you? You did so well........" If you say those things, then YOU are part of her problem! Don't expect results from your child. Just expect effort, commitment, teamness, and dedication. Use words like, "I love you. Can I do anything for you? Of course, I'm not upset with you. You're doing the best you can. It'll all work out fine. I'm here for you. Just let me know if you need me. I can't wait to see you play again. Will I still come if you don't start? Honey, I don't come to games to watch you be a star. I come to support you and your team. I come b/c I love you. If you were to come to the game with a cast on your leg, I'd still be there."
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Thank you for being patient. I had two more "I'll be back soon" to get to, but neither of them have read that haha, so you get the first response.
Have you visited my website yet? I hope you have a moment. I think you'll really like it!
Let me hear from you again, please.
Coach Houser
