Playing your best for really BAD coaches
2016/7/15 17:27:52
Question
Hi, my question is simple but the answer must be difficult because it has alluded me for 3 years now. "How do you get girls to play their best for really bad coaches?" Our HS female coach is likeable as a person and PE teacher, but she is like an immature girl, as a coach. (her father helps her as a volunteer coach) The other coach is a male school teacher and he is crass and uncouth. We have a team of girls (17 & 18 years old) that have always been very competitive softball players. (Both in club and school) they have won division and state titles, they used to always finish well above other teams in our area, and learned many great life lessons along the way. High school softball has put an end to that era! The first year they were openly belittled in team meetings for discussing their past softball accomplishments. I met with them to discuss some of my concerns, and they immediately had a team meeting and told the girls, "can you believe one of your mothers looked me right in the eye and said" ***** as they repeated to the girls something i said in a private meeting. Believe me, it is hard to be supportive of coaches that are this insensitive and immature.
The problem seems to be that the softball school coaches are more self-centered and vain than 12 cheerleaders in a room with only one mirror. And of course they are given the full support of upper staff and the AD. They have no real accomplishments in their past coaching careers, and have been very ineffective in motivating these kids. Practice drills are non-existent and are equivalent to 6th grade warm-ups. The talent of these girls could have been a feather in their caps, but instead we have watched them divide the girls, encouraged criticism of each other in team meetings, and just been a really terrible influence on the game and the sport they love.
These coaches plan our out of town tournaments around where they want to go eat! (Last year, they took the bus of girls to a Laughlin, NV buffet at 9 PM even tho we had an early game the next morning, at 8:00 AM. It was 40 miles away, 80 miles round trip. Apparently the talk on the trip to the tourney was all about the great buffet at the Colorado Belle. Needless to say, we have been back to that same tournament again this year even tho the quality of this tournament is not very good.) Another time the girls were punished for deciding the first night of a 2 day tournament to stay in and "eat healthy from Subway and get some R&R". (The coaches couldnt go out and eat together at a greasy spoon, because the girls had to be chaperoned. The coaches had to go eat in turns, so the girls were punished for the evening by telling them they had early curfew and needed to stay in their rooms. Once they realized the parents had concerns about this, they came up with some ridiculous excuse 2 weeks later.) We have watched this eating thing escalate in the last 2 years. There is no denying it. The girls want to eat lighter and the coaches are bent on going to some of the worst places because of their own eating obsessions. Our practices amount to only taking infield as you would do before a game, and some really minor batting drills.
What i've explained is only a tip of the iceberg. I am trying to remain objective even tho we only have 1 year left in high school.. so my question is, "how do we as parents, motivate our girls to play their best for these really bad coaches?" The coaches seem more motivated by where they will eat, having their family along for the trips out of town, and the stipend that they are paid each year to do this. Along with a trip to CA in the summer for coaches training, which they probably dont even attend except to sign in. The example they set gives you reason to feel that its just a free vacation on the school, as they certainly never bring back anything new. Last year a coaching clinic was held here in our area by Coach Meyers of ASU. They didnt attend it and it was right HERE IN OUR OWN BACKYARD!! Not to mention it was given by one of the greatest softball coaches of our day.
Please help. I realize that these coaches are way beyond changing their bad habits and i dont anticipate that this poor leadership will change in our last year of high school ball. So what can we do to teach our girls something positive about this bad experience, and what can we do to try to motivate them regardless of these really bad coaches? SIDENOTE: I believe we all have tried to keep our kids positive but they are young adults and see things pretty clearly on their own.
What a terrible disappointment high school softball has been.
thank you for your time.
Answer
Rhonda,
Im sorry for your child's High School Softball experience. The only advise that I could possibly give would be for you and the other concerned parents to address your School Board and enlighten them on the situation with your coaches. Good Luck, Coach Suthe.
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