Coaches

Question
QUESTION: Hello, my son is 14 years old, he's 6'1 and weighs 170 pounds. He plays DE and TE. He also kicks the ball of and the deep snapper for the punter. He works very hard and is a very determined boy. He is the captain of his team. But, we lost our last two games and the coaches started name calling and cutting the boys down telling them he had given up on  them and would just start working on next years team.all of this while cursing at them. My son takes the brunt of it all he has a big heart and comes home crying after a loss. He cries way up into the early morning telling me he sucks and can't do anything right. We have had a number of coaches wanting him to come play for them. He keeps a 4.0 grade point average and runs track and plays basketball. Can you tell me if we should move him out of this school. Is the coach being verbally abusive and should we put up with it?
Thanks,
Shelia

ANSWER: Shelia,

This sounds like a huge problem. First of all the cursing and berating of the players is not a good thing. Listen, I have coached for a long time and I can tell you that on occasion I ripped into my players good, but there is also a time to use a kind hand and be constructive. I am not a beliver in using profanity with kids in any event. Sounds like these coaches have some issues.

I would explore options, but keep in mind your sons education is the most important thing. I am just curious, what state do you live in?

Good luck,
Mark

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Hey Mark we live in Arkansas. I spoke with the athletic director of our school yesterday. He said he would try to address the problem but, wanted to let the coaches coach without interfering. It made me so mad. These boys go in at half-time doing okay in a ball game then next thing you know after being ripped apart by the coaches they can't seem to get it back together. I am heartbroken for my son. Do I keep on complaining? My son came home yesterday and said if they went home and told anything else that happens in the locker room they would be benched for the rest of the season and run until they vomit. This has to stop what do I do next? Thank you
Shelia

Answer
Shelia,

If it was my kid I would be looking at options. Not becuse of the losing, but because of the abuse. What options are available to you. Are there private schools in your area, can he transfer to a different public school and be eligible to play? I dont know the answers to these questions.

Bottom line, put your son where he can get a good education. Football only lasts a very short time and you want to make sure that he has a good foundation for success in life after football.

Good luck to you,
Mark