HS Basketball - Thanksgiving: Sports or Family

Question
Hi!  I'm really in a bind here and would appreciate some guidance.  My kid LOVES sports, especially basketball.
The HS team has regular practices, even on Thanksgiving weekend.  The coach does not excuse missing practices for any reason.  I have already bought plane tickets to visit 80 year old grandparents who live several hundred miles away.  My kids are their only Grandchildren & they are my kid's only GP.  (My own parents already passed away)

Due to distance, we see them 1-2 times a year, max.

Kid doesn't know what to do & I don't either.

Do we allow kid to stay home just to attend 4 practices for the HS BB team?  (would stay with friends) and miss a family holiday with grandparents or make kid attend family vacation & miss practices, thus possibly hurting team, coach, etc.....?

HELP HELP HELP!

Answer
Hi Val,

I have never scheduled a tournament or practices around Thanksgiving or Christmas because of situations like this. I belive family comes first and I never wanted to put my players in a situation of choosing one or the other. That being said from my past experiences if the coach made this clear that there is no missing practices and it sounds like he did then there will be consequences if your kid doesn't go to practice.

I understand your point of view as the grandparents are old and you just never know. I also understand a teenagers point of view as basketball is his or her world. Your child wanting to go to practice is not a bad thing as he or she is sticking to a commitment he or she made to his or her team, coach, school and most importantly him or herself. It sounds like there is no practice on Thursday or Friday so what I would do is go to Thanksgiving and spend time with the grandparents on Thanksgiving day and Friday and then have your kid fly home early with you or your husband and make the practices. I know this is an inconvenience but it is teaching your child a great life lesson and it satisfies everybody. It might not be the greatest situation but it is a good compromise if it is possible.

There are other options. You can talk to the coach and explain your situation and ask what the consequences will be if you do miss practice. You can cut trip short like I wrote earlier and miss 1 or 2 practices if you don't want to fly back that early. You can cancel tickets or transfer in there name and have grandparents fly out and spend Thanksgiving with you. Have your child stay with friends and attend all practices and then fly him or her out to visit grandparents at a more convenient time.

I am not sure if this helps or not but I do understand your problem and I sympathize with you. I hope you come to a decision that makes everybody happy or at least satisfies all involved. Good luck and I hope all works out for the best!