Catharsis for Paul Casey as he relives last years Augusta meltdown

But Paul Casey抯 description of his final-round fall at last year抯 Masters, a slow descent into a sporting underworld of helplessness and cruelty, is as riveting as it is honest.

For my money it says a great deal about Casey抯 current happiness that he can relate his memories of that April day with such candid straightforwardness. It is not so much a stream of consciousness as a torrent. Maybe Casey抯 recent marriage to long-term American girlfriend Jocelyn has brought him unexpected certainty.

Does he think he has changed? 揑 feel very happy. I feel like I don抰 have anything to prove to anybody.?揇id you before??揗aybe,?Casey says with that insecure sideways smile he has when not 100 per cent sure of his ground.

揕ike what??揑 don抰 know. All I know is that I don抰 really feel that now. Whatever it was, it抯 gone. I抦 not sure what I felt before, but I don抰 feel like I抦 trying to be anybody other than who I am.?br />
Would Casey rather be known now as good bloke than champion golfer? 揧eah, good bloke down the bar or whatever. I wouldn抰 give up any one of my nine wins. But they抮e not going to define me.

揟o my friends and family the golf is nothing. That抯 second. I don抰 want golf to be who I am. But I want my golfing career to be majors. When they talk about me, it would be: 慖 remember when he won the Masters in 2009.??br />
So let抯 talk about the record at the Masters. 揟hree top-11s and one missed cut,?says Casey instantly. Augusta sets up beautifully for Casey抯 high, power game and streaks of brilliant putting. He contended in his very first year, but admits now: 揑 was probably a little bit out of my depth.?br />
When Casey again went out in the penultimate group last year, you expected him to have learnt. He probably had, but Augusta decided to tear Casey apart just for the hell of it. The previous day Casey had played the front nine in 32 shots. The course took its revenge.

揑 did feel comfortable last year. I hit a poor shot to the fourth after birdieing the previous hole, but the criminal error was leaving it in that bunker, trying to be cute with it.?br />
I interject: 揑抦 going to be harsh on you. That抯 not a mistake Tiger would ever have made or Padraig would ever have made.?The interjection seems to open the floodgates and the torrent of consciousness is released.

揑 agree. What was poor was the indecision. I picked out a shot and an area. And I got in there [the bunker] and I go: 慪ou know what, I know that spot, but if I go three feet left I could hole it or get it right next to the hole.?br />
揂nd I was: 慐r, either six feet for par or maybe I hole it. Ooh, er?and then I didn抰 pick either. That抯 the mistake. The mistake is never picking a shot and giving it everything and hitting it in the water. To me that抯 not a mistake, that抯 a bad shot. I made a mistake. Flat out mistake.

揑 then hit a very good shot into the next hole and it didn抰 hold the green and I splashed out and made bogey. Again, I hit another very good looking shot on six. I splashed that out to two feet and I thought: 慜K, here we go, perfect, we抣l knock this one in and we抣l get going, right the ship.?br />
揂nd I stood over that putt and the ball moved. That was the complete wind out of the sails, just a complete punch in the 厰 Casey pauses for what seems like seconds as the rest of the world continues to walk by, 搮 stomach. That was just a horrible feeling.

揑 keep asking people: 慏id you see it move??cos I want someone else to go: 慪es, I saw it move.?But nobody抯 ever seen it move. But it did.?br />
I mention that it was replayed a few times on television. 揇id they see it move? No? Well, it did. And that抯 the only thing you can do. Call it [a one-shot penalty] on yourself. That was such a horrible feeling. From that point my head was, not spinning with anger ?I felt, I don抰 know what to do. Now what? I抳e hit a good shot. I haven抰 done anything wrong and I抳e just walked off with another bogey. Now what?

揑 think I three-putted the next or something and it was just like, help, complete help, I was having a mini-meltdown.?Casey laughs. 揑t was the thing that I haven抰 actually done much wrong, and it抯 all falling apart.

揑t抯 such a difficult golf course that you have to be on top of your game. If you抮e not on top of your game you can be made to look very silly, amateurish, whatever. That was what I felt. I felt, boy, I don抰 have control of my golf ball, now what? This is going to be very difficult to get it round from this point.

揑 actually played a very good back nine. But the tournament was done by then. It was over. Unfortunately.?br />
It is a long time since Casey has talked so openly to the media. He has always been a bit different. At times there is a touch of the Kevin Pietersen about his honesty, but it sets him apart in a good way. Maybe there is catharsis in reliving last year. Another golfer might see a sports psychologist, but Casey gave them up long ago. He knows what they would tell him. Stay in the moment, take each shot as it comes?

揅orrect. That抯 all it is. Do you want a job? But it is difficult to do. I need to be better at it. I抦 extremely good when my back抯 against the wall.?Casey reels off a couple of matches from last year抯 Ryder Cup to prove his point. His problem has always been not the last-green heroics, but staying in the moment long enough to get there.

So if he got in contention again this year ?if he was within a shot or two of the lead playing the 17th, just as Justin Rose was two years ago ?would he have what it takes?

Casey says: 揑 fancy my chances. Michael Jordan didn抰 hit every single buzzer beater, but he made a lot of them and people remember the ones that he made. You can抰 control the other guy. But I feel good about my chances.?br />
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