Tigers Scarlett Letter: Live Beyond Public Humiliation
Introduction
In the 1850 novel The Scarlet Letter, author Nathaniel Hawthorne takes the reader on an emotional roller coaster with a moral-laden saga. The setting takes place in the 17th-century Puritan settlement of Boston. Carrying her infant Pearl, Hester Prynne bears a scarlet letter "A" on her breast as a punishment for her apparent adultery. Despite the public humiliation, Hester never reveals her accomplice, Rev. Arthur Dimmesdale. Therefore, she receives the wrath of her community. Surprisingly, Rev. Dimmesdale sits quietly by as Hester bears all of the public shame.
Tiger Woods may feel like he's bearing his own scarlet letter. Yet, Elin Nordegren, Tiger's wife, endures an apparent burden; she carries the public humiliation of her husband's infidelity. Many people speculate that the beautiful supermodel will stand by her man due to the millions of dollars at stake. Others argue that Elin will leave Tiger. Unfortunately, this situation plays out like another celebrity circus. Witnessing a public humiliation isn't pleasant. It is easy to speculate as we watch the unraveling of one's life. Some people can remember, growing up, the cruelty of youthful jokes in public at someone else's expense. This article examines how to deal with public humiliation in order to move forward.
The Circumstance
Life is more than a game. Tiger may be the greatest golfer is history. However, Tiger's own imperfection has damaged his public persona. On November 25th, the National Enquirer published a story alleging Tiger Wood's infidelity. On November 27th, Tiger crashed his Cadillac Escalade into a fire hydrant in his neighborhood without apparent explanation. He refused to talk with the policemen. Shortly afterward, several women claimed they had extramarital affairs with Tigers. Tiger has remained quiet except for his website posting: "This situation is my fault, and it's obviously embarrassing to my family and me." His delayed response to any wrongdoing (stopping Enid's public humiliation) came much too late. In fact, he may not be able to rapidly repair his tarnished image. According to a Gallup poll, his unfavorable rating surged up to 57%, compared to only 8% four years ago.
The Healing Strategy
Public humiliation can heal over time. Public humiliation can be defined as "an action that allows an individual's personal embarrassment to become publicly known." Shame is defined as "a strong emotion caused by guilt or disgrace." Shame is not always bad. For example, children know not to misbehave in public due to the fact that they might embarrass their parents. However, there isn't much positive that one can say about public humiliation. It is an awful feeling. If the act is done by a loved one, it becomes a tormented burden. Why would anyone do such a thing? To take back one's integrity from public humiliation requires a great amount of courage. For many people, it takes personal healing that involves moving away from public scrutiny. In fact, a spiritual renewal can assist in the recovery process toward forgiveness. In many cases, celebrities are unwilling to give up the public limelight. Unfortunately, some people can allow this humiliation to chew up their self-worth, thereby becoming a prisoner of their imperfections.
Some folks possess the inner strength to press onward. However, it doesn't mean the individual forgets the humiliation. Lewis Smedes, author of Forgive & Forget: Healing the Hurts We Don't Deserve, spent a lifetime understanding how people can forgive others. Yet, he did not underestimate the damage caused to the victim: "You can forgive someone almost anything. But you cannot tolerate everything. . . . We don't have to tolerate what people do just because we forgive them for doing it. Forgiving heals us personally. To tolerate everything only hurts us all in the long run." For example, Jenny Sanford, wife of South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford, filed for divorce after her husband's affair was revealed - showing that it is possible for a person involved in such a situation to take empowering action.
Conclusion
Getting over public humiliation isn't an easy process. Today, public apologies are rather common. Many public figures have used the public relations playbook by announcing their transgression with a contrite spirit in hopes of getting the story behind them. Yet, they find it harder to remove the damage done to their victim. In fact, the person who caused the public humiliation does not get off free. In the Scarlett Letter, Dimmesdale's secret sin haunts him in the form of deterioting health and torment by Hester's husband. Likewise, Tiger is the center of tabloid news and late night talkshow banter. Many wonder if Enid can overcome her hurt and accept Tiger back, or whether she will choose to move on with her own life. For many individuals who are not in the limelight, they must gather the strength and fight for their integrity and self-worth. Time is still ticking.
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